You don't really know what you've got till it's gone.
It’s more true that anyone could possibly realize. I can think of so many instances in my life where I took for granted what I had, and regretted it so much when it was gone. I suppose the most notable thing I’ve lost over the years is my Grandmother. She was my rock in life, the most important person to me when I was young. She was taken from me when I was thirteen by stomach cancer. I sort of always saw her as someone who would be there no matter what. I saw myself asking for her advice when I was graduating high school, college, getting married, buying a house, having kids…growing old. When she died, it came as a rude awakening that nothing lasts forever, that you really don’t know what you have until it’s truly gone. I have so many regrets when it comes to her, so many things I wish I could have said and done. The fact of the matter is, it’s too late to do anything. I know that.
I used to be really good friends with this girl named Summer. Somehow, against the odds, we became really close. I say somehow because she’s everything I’ve ever really hated in people. She was that blonde Barbie in high school we all wanted to cut. She hated to read and was ditzy as they came. However, against the odds, we became great friends. A couple of years ago, over the summer break, she moved closer to where I lived. I spent so much time around her and her family, and grew to love them like a family of my own. Her parents treated me like a son. I also saw how she treated them, and let me tell you, it wasn’t good. From that time on, I sort of grew to dislike her. She was such an ungrateful person, always getting what she wanted and then sulking because she couldn’t get more. She’d sneak out all the time, talk back, argue, and never do anything they asked, and when she did, it was usually with some smart remark.
We had a falling out because of how she acted with them and how she was changing. She began drinking, doing drugs, and eventually we just stopped talking altogether because anytime she got in contact with me, it was only because she wanted something. Well, flash forward to about four months or so ago. I was feeling very nostalgic and was driving by where they lived. So I stopped by, just to say hi. Summer wasn’t there (because she moved in with her loser boyfriend after dropping out of high school) but I stayed for nearly twelve hours just chatting with her parents and catching up and playing with her little brother and sister. Since that day I’ve tried to make it over there at least once a week to see them and spend time with them. I’ve grown to sincerely wish that they were the family I really had. I saw how much pain Summer’s mom was in because of how she treated her, saw how resentful her father was because of what she was doing with her life.
I few weeks ago I learned that they’re moving to Washington. Julie and Casey, the parents I wish I had had, and their two kids Cody and Kailee, the two little kids I love like siblings, are moving to another state. Despite everything she put them through, they are begging her to go with them, begging her to drop the jobless felon she’s shacked up with and join her family. She says no. She can’t leave him. I spent Easter with them today. I helped them hide the eggs, watched as Kody, six, and Kailee, three, ran around the yard searching for the eggs. I ate dinner with them, watched movies, played with the kids, and just talked with Julie and Casey. Summer showed up well after everything was through, said one quick hello, then went to the pig sty of a room they let her keep. Later, when dessert was served, she came downstairs and ate and said she needed to talk to me about something in private. She dragged me outside and down the street so she could tell me how she likes her boss and how he likes her and she’s thinking about leaving her boyfriend and blah blah blah.
It just made me mad. She’s so tied up on what she should do between the two and she’s not even considering how she’s throwing away the family that loves her so much despite what she’s done to them. I truly wish that I could have grown up with her family. I see what she’s throwing away and it makes me so mad. Had I been with them, I would have had an amazing father instead of one who was never there because he was too busy getting high and winding up in prison. I would have had a fantastic mom who was attentive to her kids instead of one with anger issues who solved everything by yelling. I would have had a brother, and eventually a sister, instead of spending the majority of my life alone and friendless. I might actually be happy right now, had I been born into that family. And she’s tossing them away like they’re nothing.
I started off this whole thing with the intent on telling you guys to always cherish what you have, because when it’s gone you’ll regret it for the rest of your life if you don’t. It ended up a suppose a resentful rant about how much I wish I could have been in her place. Either way, I suppose the moral is cherish what you have or else you’ll regret it.
No comments:
Post a Comment